*Hugh Jackman Naked*
Now that I have your full attention, I will say that the above statement is one of the very few good things about X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Sad to say, I left the theatre overwhelmed with disappointment. (Aside from the fact that I have a personal dislike for the female lead in the film, due to the fact that she was Wendy in 13 Going on 30 and in real life is married to the awesomely smoldering Stephen Strait.)
I went in with the love and complete adoration of the X-Men trilogy on my mind.
I saw the first X-Men film with little to no knowledge of the comic, so forgive me in advance: my reviews of these films are based solely on the films themselves, not the stories they are based on. You are swept away immediately by the startling and heart-wrenching introduction of a small boy being separated from his family in a concentration camp, and then flying directly into the heartache of Rogue's truth: she, now hitting teenagerhood, can no longer touch another human being without harming or even killing them. And then suddenly you are transported into their world: separated by differences and by fear, the viewer is just another outcast mutant along for the ride with some extremely personal and memorable characters; "Aurora" Storm, Scott "Cyclops", Xavier, Jean Grey, and of course, Logan "Wolverine."
The second film, X2, did not disappoint as I went in with extremely high expectations. In fact, X2 is my favorite of the trilogy. I love how the story between Rogue and Bobby "Iceman" evolves and sides are joined and divided and joined again. It is dark and sinister and enemies unite over common enemies only to backstab each other yet again: fantastic.
The third, X-Men III, jolted me. Jean Grey, now "Phoenix," takes the central role and knocks out one of my favorite characters early on. I was rendered speechless at the shocking turn of events. Though it featured my very favorite character of all the series, "Angel," it is my least favorite of the trilogy just because so much is lost and so much tragedy is experienced. I just feel like some of the things weren't necessary for a good movie to happen. There were other things that could have been done to make it a worthwhile film. I do adore Wolverine's self-sacrifing (and clothing-sacrificing) attempt to save the Phoenix from total destruction, as it is an incredible scene, both visually and musically- the score knocked my socks off. But I was still left feeling like it wasn't as good as X2.
So it was with high hopes, expectations of tie-ins from the other films, explanations that maybe weren't featured in X2 (where I thought Wolverine already had everything finally figured out- guess not) about where Logan came from, I had fingers crossed for a decent plot and some great action.
Nay to the first and yay to the second- though way over the top to the point where I just had to roll my eyes.
Let me explain: I just couldn't figure how Liev "me alone" Schrieber was the same Sabertooth from X-Men (the first). Where's the continuity people??? Where's the long blond hair and shaggy fur-draped ensemble? Where's the real animalistic appearance, not just the "homeless guy" look that Liev has got going on? The brother thing was so far from all the other storylines that the writers had going on before. (My only thought was that maybe Sabertooth and Wolverine were brothers in the comic but I was told by several avid reader that this was not the case.)
Secondly, "Jimmy" aka Logan, (really racking up on the akas here) fell in love and got married, lalala. How LONG exactly does it take for a couple to meet, date, and marry, and be living in the mountains? Because A went straight to C and bypassed B, leaving the audience not giving a crap when whaaa whaaa death. Boo. Hoo. I did not feel that amazing intense passion that once was (or will be as this is a prequel) between Jean Grey and Logan. There was just no chemistry- just a slutty looking chick straddling Logan and then biting it a scene later. Not impressed with the love storyline. Too short lived and underdeveloped to care. In fact, one person I was watching this with FELL ASLEEP.
Now the CG? Phenomenal. Stunts? Well played. Ryan Reynolds's character has the best ninja sword moves I've seen in some time. Yet, to seconds later, HE's gone! What gives? The only great thing lasts one scene.
Another dumb thing? The dude with the guns, Agent Zero. So he can aim real good, big whoop.
Well, there's always the drive-a-motorcycle-out-of-an-explosion-jump-off-the-top-of-a-crashing-helicopter-then-walk-nonchalantly-away-from-another-explosion scene.
Don't even get me started on the final fight sequence. Really. It's that nuts.
One huge redeeming factor (besides two hours of staring at Hugh Jackman- who really is amazingly talented and deserved a WAY better movie than this so much that it's sickening) is Gambit. Love him! The actor, the accent, the card tricks, the sonic walking stick, the climbing up the wall bit, the "I won her in a card game" plane... he stole the whole show for me.
Blurabbit's take: I'm pulling a... really big blank out of the hat. Where was the movie? It was all the good pieces of the other movies ripped up, thrown about, picked up and reassembled into not so greatness. Sad thing is, this one's got a spinoff coming out of it. Picture this: A spinoff of a prequel of a trilogy. At least it's about Deadpool and not Zero. Who did that guy think he was? If I have to pull out something, I guess it's a Joker card. Because although Gambit was cool, I'd rather be watching Batman.
